In the chain of events of the happenings for the past week, I learned alot. I learned what I've been missing, I learned about people, I learned about me.
It took me awhile to admit, but I've been missing alot of things.
I miss the excitement, I miss the anticipation, I miss the adrenaline rush. I miss the feelings. I miss being treated right.
All I've been doing is trying to do the right thing. Now that I learn to let go, it feels good. The not caring is the best way right now, for me. It may not be the right way, but who cares?
I've been in a box for so long. Inside, looking out. Now that I put myself out of the box, the view is great. Looking back into the box, I wonder how the hell could I have been contented inside. I forgot what it was like before I got into the box. The box may seems big and comfortable, but it is unstable.
But being outside once again, I need to face the other stuff that associate with it. Some ugly, some beautiful. Unlike before, I'm more prepared this time. Now all I need is for the brick road to appear. It may not come as I remembered, but a road is still a road. Bumps are still bumps. Somehow they don't seem so scary anymore.
In the past week, I learned that you cannot trust somebody fully. No matter how sweet the words sound, they're just that : words. They even have a song for it.
Doesn't matter. What matters right now is I'm fine with myself. I'm content with what I'm doing. I may be tired but I know by the end of the day, I can go to bed smiling and with better attitude to face whatever may come. Everyday is a new day. New things to learn, new things to face, new stuff to consider. New possibility to conquer.
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